I have a confession to make. I don’t really give a crap about college sports. I grew up in Maine and went to Fordham. So unless I was a big hockey fan (I’m not) or partial to thinking about when Vince Lombardi played football (he went to Fordham) I would have had to care about some school I didn’t go to from a state I didn’t care about. And I just couldn’t muster the interest.
See, like with a lot of things, I find it hard to let go. If I become a fan of something, I usually don’t change. So since I grew up in Maine I am forever linked to Boston sports teams (and 0 colleges except for Fordham and they always suck). And while I like watching the tournament because it is fun, who gives a crap who wins? I know we all pretend that there could be a huge upset, and sometimes there is in the first or second round. But it never pans out. You might as well root for the fat kid with the club foot from District 4. He might make it a day or so, but you know he’s gonna die.
So since I pay the president, I’m just copying his picks. He has the FBI, CIA and NSA on his side so I figure he has the best chance out of anyone to get it right. Doubt me? Then link me to your brackets in the comments. I will do some sort of stupid prize. Or whatever. Yay America!
I was gone all week and now I have some kind of terrible illness and ate some zinc and every time I cough I die. And if I actually die then I guess I will leave the site to whoever the funniest commenter is. That seems like a good punishment. THINGS JUST GOT REAL! *coughs feebly, cries*
Third Place goes to elssar in the Jessica Biel Texas Chainsaw Massacre Gif post.
“Seriously I don’t know what I’m going to do with 100 something gifs of Jessica Biel in her underwear.”Hey, what happened to your arm? You sprain it or something?
“Suck the hairspray out of Donald Trump’s sweaty comb-over” was already taken.
This week’s cat thing is this!
As for comments? We have Angela Mia on Friday Nineties in third place with one of the longest comments ever (size matters)
“…like going bareback in a crack house with someone you can’t see under a blanket.” Oh my! Definitely sounds like you are speaking from experience there!
Funny that you insist on using the word “boner,” though. I never did understand that. I mean, there are no bones in the penis. At least not in human ones.
Anyway…. you forgot to mention these great tunes:
The Gym Class Locker Room Blues
I Swear, I Just Have to Pee from the album Slumber Party Wake-Up Call
Or my all-time fave, I Don’t Want You, Doctor (But That Glove Sure Feels Nice)
[Note to Self: Find a new crack house]
In second place we have Cornmeal on the Today in History with Eva Halloween: Carnival post. Why? Because even though he works here he rarely comments so whenever he does it is a big deal. His pearl of wisdom?
Tough competition indeed. But the winner this week was…..
I was gone all week so when I came back I printed out all the comments and read them. I’m a big shot and can afford to waste paper and ink. Speaking of wasting paper and ink, here are some comments that came close!
- Catswiththumbs from the circus post. “The circus is just a mobile dimwit vortex. Everyone visiting the circus looks like a 2:00AM Walmart customer – one eye, hairlip, has one of those shoes with the giant brick thing on the bottom . . . a black hole for the genetically unfortunate.”
- And Eva Halloween squeezed out a good one on the same post. Mom jokes never get old! “Well yeah, but your mom came so highly recommended on Yelp.”
But, it turns out the best comment of the week came from PelvicBoogie from last week’s “This week in history“
Now I know Acadia thinks Halloween is a pretty big deal around here. I think my site, The Year of Halloween, might have the edge when it comes to Halloween enthusiasm But I have to hand it to you Superficial Gallery readers – you folks know how to mad dog a contest. This year’s Halloween Picture Perfect featured nearly $1,000 worth of prizes from cool places like Kingston and Uncommon Goods and got close to 100 photo submissions, with 8 out of 12 winners playing from Superficial Gallery.
Great job, cheaters.
Anyway, big sloppy thanks to everyone who played from both sites. Of course, I expect a full rematch next October – sinister plots are already being hatched! Now, on to the prizes!
- Superficial Gallery reader Matthew H won a 16GB Kingston SD Card for submitting the first contest entry.
- Superficial Gallery reader Christy R won an UncommonGoods.com Moon Clock for participating in the scavenger hunt.
- The Year of Halloween reader Misty Layne won two bottles of Demitri’s Bloody Mary Seasonings for her response to Superstorm Sandy vs. Halloween.
- Superficial Gallery reader Kevin D won an 8GB Kingston thumb drive for participating in our October Google Hangout.
- Superficial Gallery reader Amber O won a bottle of Demitri’s Bloody Mary Seasonings for participating in the scavenger hunt.
- The Year of Halloween reader Sandee won two bottles of Demitri’s Bloody Mary Seasonings for her response to Superstorm Sandy vs. Halloween.
- Superficial Gallery writer Ami B won two UncommonGoods.com Face Mugs for Most Blatant Attempt to Bribe the Judges.
- The Year of Halloween reader Jenny M took first prize in the Costume Contest with her Snake Charmer costume and won a $150 gift card to Bettie Page Clothing.
- The Year of Halloween reader Alexander Wolfe took third place in the Scavenger Hunt with 68 points and won a 16GB Kingston Portable Wi Drive and a bottle of Demitri’s Bloody Mary Seasonings.
- Superficial Gallery reader Angie P took second place in the Scavenger Hunt with 113 points and won a 16GB Portable Wi Drive from Kingston, a set of UncommonGoods.com’s
Himalayan Salt Tequila Glasses, and a bottle of Demitri’s Bloody Mary Seasonings.
- Superficial Gallery reader Pamela T took first place in the Scavenger Hunt with 114 points and won a Solid State Hard Drive and an SD card from Kingston, plus a bottle of Demitri’s Bloody Mary Seasonings.
Halloween can mean a lot of different things to people. I know this year is kind of crappy (at least if you live on the East Coast) but if you do have Internet you might as well take a spin through these pics and vote on your favorites. And someone who comments on the post is going to win one of the million prizes Eva Halloween and I still have (feel free to enter the big contest that is still going). So what’s your favorite? Legit scary? Cute? Sexy? A sexy girl making a cute face who is actually Satan?
Well we don’t have the third one but we have the others I think. I don’t remember what I picked now. You see for yourselves.