The Valentine’s Day Bandit – since 1976

In my hometown, someone, or a bunch of someone’s, hangs red hearts on white background all over the city on the night before Valentine’s Day.  We call him/her/them the Valentine’s Day Bandit and it makes me happy every year to see that it still happens after 41 years. This year, as you can see in…

Leave L.L. Bean alone you Idiots – I’m not Kidding

  I’m from Maine and I am telling every idiot on Twitter and every other nonsense outlet that is latching onto the news that one of the board members of the company donated to a Trump Super Pac and telling people to boycott it to STOP IT RIGHT NOW YOU IGNORANT JACKHOLES! I get that everyone…

Well none of these things seem very good….

So like a dummy I went to Twitter and Imgur today (I also went to Politico but they pay people to do journalism which is not nearly as fun as dopes on Twitter and Imgur) and I found out a few things.  Exactly none of them were good.  The list in no particular order Carrie…

Vegans are Bankrupting England

So I admit that vegans can be super annoying.  But I also admit that when I see videos of what we as people do to cows and chickens and stuff I am pretty sure we will all suffer those same fates when we all go to Hell.  I am certainly not going to link any…

Lawyer Choked by Chicken – Drops Lawsuit

The other night we had our friends over to watch Walking Dead and in honor of what happened in the season premiere we planned on serving Popeye’s Chicken.  Get it?  POP EYE?  Well, even if you don’t, I am pretty sure that the number of times you have eaten Popeye’s (or any other fast food…

Finally! Satan Comes to School! Kind of!

You know how when your kids get out of school way before you get out of work because school is useless?  Well what are you gonna have them do for a couple hours before you have to give them rotisserie chicken while you are on a conference call with the boss and some jerk who…

We got Attacked Again. Yawn

So NYC and NJ got bombed over the weekend.  Don’t worry, I rarely go outside so I was fine.  But I did see that they caught the suspect.  That’s good but I now it is all over the news and omg they made so many bombs and did you see the robot and Trump and…