Friday Nineties – Madonna – Ray of Light

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Madonna was 40 when Ray of Light came out in 1998.  So that means she is 55 now.  And she has just gotten more and more terrible as she ages.  I was talking about her at work today and these things came up:

  1. Nobody could believe how old she was.  Not in a mean way, but in a “damn she had been around my whole life” way.
  2. She sucks.  That was in a mean way.  Like, she is never nice as far as I can tell.  I have never heard a story where she did something nice for someone.  Like, ever.  I googled for “has madonna ever done something nice” and got this:
    Screenshot-2013-11-22-20.41Nothing!  I mean come on.  I even read her Ask Me Anything on Reddit and she wasn’t even really nice then.  She was a smart ass. Not that she isn’t smart, but she isn’t nice and that bugs me.
  3. ALL her songs are good.  That is a distinction held by only The Beatles and Michael Jackson as far as I can tell.  You might not like all her songs, but I think they are all empirically good.  I mean the ones that count.  I don’t need some Nermal crawling out of a closet complaining about the fourth song on her third album or some crap like that.  I mean her important songs.

And then I asked a question that nobody could answer right away.  And it is weird they it is hard to answer.

If you could only have one of them alive, would you pick Madonna or Michael Jackson?

EVERYONE had to stop and think.  Some people are still thinking.  Musical ability aside, how mean must you be to make people wonder if you should live instead of a kid diddler.  Who would YOU pick?

Also, as in point number three above, Ray of Light is a good song.  Weird that it was the same decade as Vogue.  It’s like two different people.  Sort of creepy.

  1. Wow. I guess Michael Jackson. At least he’s contributed something. All of her music has been fluff.

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  2. You mean ever alive or right now? I’d say Madonna I think. She might not be super nice as you point out, but I don’t think she’s ever hurt anyone.

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  3. I have always liked Madonna better. Her song (and video) “Oh Father” is multilayered creepy beautiful brilliance.

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  4. Oh, and she’s not a pedophile.
    Even if she does date men half her age.

    #cougarnotpedophile
    #dothemath
    #sorryMJ

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  5. Choo

    With all of her money you would think she could turn that sad protruding umbilicus into a diamond or something… Bedazzle it…anything! It has a wow factor but not in the way you would want someone to say wow….

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    • It looks like some kind of horrible flesh-colored tick. I assume it will drop off at some point.

      *imagines finding Madonna’s writhing umbilicus-tick on the sidewalk*

      I might need to cut back on the horror movies a little.

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