Ice Road Trucker Girl Maya Sieber

Acadia Einstein

I'll show those truckers what I can do. This shirt says: treat me as an equal!

Maya Sieber Ice Road Trucker

Never let it be said that if something is mildly successful that it won’t be copied over and over again.  Given the success of introducing their first female character, Lisa Kelly, the History Channel decided to find the prettiest truck driver they could find.  It must have taken a long time.  I bet it would have been easier to find a halfway decent looking girl and teach her to drive a truck.  Why?  Because good looking people don’t have to take shitty jobs unless they are teenagers or in witness protection.

Don’t believe me?  Well, when is the last time you said: “Look how hot that janitor is!” or “put down that bag of Whoppers, take off that headset and kiss me!”?  Never?  Exactly.  May Sieber seems to have all of her teeth and the fact that she has been driving a truck for three whole years means one of two things.  1:  She will die pretty quickly.  2: It’s not all that hard to drive on the ice roads.  Given the fact that I have been watching the show for a long time and I haven’t seen anyone die or even get hurt makes me think this is a scam.

That will work out well for Maya Sieber.  I’m sure that she’ll have a great time hauling loads all over the Great White North.  And just to make sure we talk about equality for a minute: this whole thing is stupid.  Girls should not do that job.  Just like men should not be nurses, women should not drive truck.  I know this because I would be a great truck driver which means it is a gross job.  So stay tuned to this space for updates on how Maya is doing.  Hopefully there won’t be an accident or a gang bang or an accidental gang bang.  I hope it is just: she drove to this place and gave the people there some chips.  Or a pipe.  Or a pool table.  I don’t know what they need.  Watch the video after the jump and shut up.

Author:
I have run the site since 2005. And I have to say I am pretty damn proud of it. I wrote the book Whalewolf (sold on Smashwords.com) and am not even close to tired so I am just going to keep going. I was born in Portland, Maine and I currently live in Charlotte, North Carolina. I keep hoping that at some point all these weird rebels are gonna say: "SURPRISE!" and act normal. Six years and counting....

20 Comments

  1. sangfroid
    sangfroidReply
    June 4, 2011 at 8:06 am

    She should dress warmer.

  2. Don E. Chute
    June 4, 2011 at 10:06 pm

    I have a lot of time on my hands…I’ll buy her a truck if I can ride her err,I mean ride with her!

    If I die,it will be smilin’ Plus, sangfroid I will make sure she dresses warm…

  3. sangfroid
    sangfroidReply
    June 5, 2011 at 2:35 pm

    Girls wearing Lingerie should not be driving trucks in Alaska. They should be driving trucks where I can see them with special glass doors and a 1-900-HOWS MY DRIVING? number on the side.

  4. DaveyHo
    DaveyHoReply
    June 5, 2011 at 10:49 pm

    Hiya Maya! Good luck last winter! LOL Hope you survived! I lived in Fairbanks for a year, you are gonna LOVE spring & summer. Be sure to take a pleasure cruise to Anchorage, as a passenger, so you can see all the breathtaking sights without being distracted with driving. Believe it or not, pot was legal when I was there! The bars had to close for 45 minutes, as I recall, at two or three am. Everybody went outside, pure daylight, sharing doobs….the “good old” days!

  5. welder one
    welder oneReply
    July 11, 2011 at 12:29 pm

    You are absolutely beautiful and sexy. Go get’em BABY!!

  6. Justin
    JustinReply
    July 31, 2011 at 5:03 pm

    Have you ever been involved in or around the transportation industry? It may not be as glamorous as oh, say ridiculous-opinion-blogger, but to compare it to fast food or janitor is completely inaccurate. How do I know? YOU, Mr. author could do either of the forementioned jobs. You sir without plenty of training and certifications could not get behind the wheel of an 80,000 lb 18-wheeler and perform adequately or even safely, let alone legally. I don’t believe you would know a jackknife from a buck-knife. You say its not that difficult to run the ice road. Have you ever been across Wyoming in a blizzard? Its treacherous, and that’s a major interstate highway(I-80). I can only imagine the danger of running the Dalton, a small winding 2-lane road road with much steeper grades, more snow, and colder temperatures.
    I believe the following saying applies to you, Acadia: better to be THOUGHT a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.

  7. Acadia
    July 31, 2011 at 8:40 pm

    Justin, I have been intimately involved in the transportation industry. More involved than I wanted to be. So I know what I’m talking about.

    Secondly, I didn’t compare driving a truck to being a janitor. I said there are no hot chick janitors. Read all the words in all the sentences. Then you can blast me all you want.

    Thirdly, I am from Maine so I don’t need to hear you crying about Wyoming or any other weather crap. And I know it is hard to drive in. Go listen to Dick Curless sing about the Hainesville woods in Maine: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4aFzfDv2hz0

    I bet you don’t have dead one eyed country singers singing about your…driveway.

    Anyway – the point of this site is jokes. A jackknife is an accident that only a vehicle hauling a trailer can experience. A buck knife is what I use to stab zombies. And even though you attack me, I would still use my buck knife to stab a zombie in the ass, thus allowing you to escape. I’m a good person!

  8. sangfroid
    sangfroidReply
    July 31, 2011 at 9:22 pm

    The ice roads were dangerous in Soviet Russia during WW2 or in Canada in the fifties when there was a lot of actual lake ice driving. Now they try to put as much of the road as possible on boggy crap that is only passable when it freezes.

    Post more sexy Janitors you ridiculous-opinion-blogger!

  9. Nicole
    July 31, 2011 at 11:33 pm

    Holy frak! What a blowout!

  10. sangfroid
    sangfroidReply
    August 1, 2011 at 5:53 am

    Nikki I think Acadia said you were too smart to be a trucker because you’re a girl.

  11. don
    donReply
    August 29, 2011 at 7:32 pm

    Arcadia is jsut a simple minded person with no idea what it takes to drive a big rig. he’s involved all right but only in the oil change bay swaping filters at the local petro !

  12. mister miller
    September 3, 2011 at 2:11 pm

    Wow…you are definately a talented blogger ! Keep up the exceptional work !

  13. mark
    January 31, 2012 at 4:00 am

    maya and lisa make the history channel worth watching again…i think i might climb the pole and hook up the cable again

  14. Daniel
    DanielReply
    March 14, 2012 at 6:28 pm

    “”Because good looking people don’t have to take shitty jobs unless they are teenagers or in witness protection.””

    ok so who is the moron that started the post.. You are a fool.. This “SHITTY JOB” makes it possible for you to live.. everything you have or will have was in a truck at some point and the average starting wage for a trucker starts.. I SAID STARTS at over $40,000 a year TAKE HOME..lol.. thats not shitty pay and its more than i started out making in an office with a bachelors degree…. needless to say i am now a trucker..

  15. me
    meReply
    July 4, 2012 at 11:01 pm

    As far as the comment about how men shouldn’t be nurses, screw you on that. I’ve been one for 20 years and if you code I am the nurse you want at your bedside.

    • Acadia
      July 6, 2012 at 9:26 pm

      I don’t know why you need to screw me :sad:

  16. Fat saul
    Fat saulReply
    July 8, 2012 at 4:30 pm

    Maya are ya still takin loads?

  17. John Wright
    John WrightReply
    June 11, 2013 at 7:26 pm

    Lisa got all the publicity but Maya was the one who drove me up the wall. I’d really love to show her how my peter’s built.

Let us know what you think. Being on-topic is NOT required.