puff daddy

When I have hip hop parties, I have them in weird institutional kitchens.

It is about time that I got all the way around to Biggie.  I guess I could have waited.  Wasn’t like he’s going anywhere (too soon?).  But he was awesome and deserves to be in.  And I used this song out of the bazillions I could have picked for a few reasons:

  • “Guess that’s why they broke and you so paid” is the best piece of American writing since “Isn’t it pretty to think so.”
  • Puff Daddy looks like he is 19
  • The ridiculousness of trying to catch a boat with a helicopter.  Nobody goes fishing with a parrot.  And no, don’t tell me about all the birds that catch fish.  I don’t need your “facts” messing up my jokes professor kill joy.
  • The ridiculous of driving backwards in a car for like an hour while getting chased buy a bunch of motorcycles and a Hummer.  Why would you not have time to turn around front ways?   Or just stop and drive the other way?  Then the motorcycles would have had to drive backwards and I think that is impossible.  Poor planning like that is prolly why Biggie got killed.  If his security details go to move was “drive backwards” he never had a chance.  :(

Sorry about the dead one. What can I do? Crop her out? That would be mean!

TLC was a good group.  I guess you can’t call them a band cause they didn’t play any instruments?  I dunno.  But they sort of ruled over the 90′s as a trio of saucy yummy little sort of singer rappers.  Well Left Eye, the one who died, rapped.  The others I guess just sang?  And…undulated.  Check out the video after the jump.  Undulation city.  And it also highlights the pinnacle of 90′s video making style.  Put reflective clothing on people, use a fish eye lens and undulate until someone sends you a check.  Worked for Puff Daddy.  Hey, what happened to Ma$e?  Think he’s p$$ed that Ke$ha stole his gimmick?

Oh, btw – I was never a scrub.  I always had a car, and even if I lived with my mom, our mansion was so big that she never knew I was there.  So hear that Chili?  Come over here and undulate.  Not you T-Boz.  You scare me a li’l bit.  As usual, video and lyrics after the jump.  Oh, and sorry that apparently people think it is fine to let you go to youtube to see a video but make sure all the ones you can embed have to be shitty quality and censored!  If only I had a buddy in Bulgaria, he could do well hosting copyrighted shit over there…

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