Whalewolf

You may have all forgotten that I am an accomplished author. Well allow me to rectify that.
I am an accomplished author.
Go buy Whalewolf. I get $.56 cents every time someone buys it for $.99 cents. Apparently I have a terrible agent. Wondering if it’s any good? Well check out this review from renowned literary critic N. Jill Marsh.
Okay, bought and read. I enjoyed it except for the two typos. You need a copy editor, dude.
So buy the thing so I can afford to hire a copy editor to fix it. Then again, she’s from Canada so who knows what she thinks a typo is. Maybe I spelled “check” without a Q. Go ahead and buy it and maybe you can find the typos. Now it is not just a book, it’s an adventure!
I think I did it! Click the gray button to buy it! PayPal!
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I was sitting in my big overstuffed chair in my study, smoking a pipe and reading a giant newspaper and it occurred to me that my amazing literary achievement, Whalewolf, was not available on any kind of electromagnetomaton for voices. Harumph! I exclaimed. I must certainly find my way to the local recording shop and try make my tome available to the blind and the handless. Can’t turn a page? Well, no worries, m8! You can simply press play with your nose.
As I sauntered past the apothecary (my opium supplies being quite high at the moment I had no need to stop) I had a bit of a skip in my step. How grand it will be to allow the general populous to hear my dulcet tones carrying along the wires of the world. I noticed the newsstand was not carrying the latest edition of my favored periodicals. Blast! But my disappointment would have to wait. I was going to record.
Some time later, I exited the shop with the electrofile you see below. Unfortunately, there was only enough wax cylinder to complete the beginning of my epic drama. That means that you will have to use your “computer mouse” to purchase the remainder and read it yourself. The man in the shop assured me that despite its incompleteness it was completely appropriate for me to call it am “Audio Book”. It’s not false advertising. It’s “bait and switch”.
On April 2, 2011 I wondered out loud during Podcaturday what would happen if a werewolf bit a whale. Beans and Melzer told me to write it so I did. Now I need you to buy it as I assume it will make me rich. This is legit, too. It’s a whole story. Check out the description of Whalewolf:
What happens when a werewolf decides it wants seafood? Find out how a detective from a small town in South Florida learns how big wolves can get. He also finds out that his girlfriend might be into some weird stuff but that’s not the main point of the story. Focus on the werewolf and the whale! This story is guaranteed to contain no less than one whale and one werewolf or your money back.
That’s a pretty sweet deal right there. It’s only $.99 so if you don’t buy it it means you’re poor. So ha ha….poor person. Remember, that’s Whalewolf – only ninety nine cents!
