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Advice From Gwyneth Paltrow, The World's Most Beautiful Woman

Gwyneth Paltrow on Being Famous - Superficial Gallery
You may have heard People’s recent announcement that Gwyneth Paltrow is the most beautiful woman in the world. I’ll save you from reading the interview (you’re welcome), but you’ll be pleased to know that Gwynnie was shocked, SHOCKED, to learn that she’d been chosen. No word if she was equally shocked last week when Star named her as our most hated celeb, but luckily Gwyneth has humbly turned the other cheek and will continue to dole out thoughtful advice to you commoners other normal, jeans-wearing, working moms.  As a Superficial Gallery special, we’ve put together her 10 most gosh darn helpful nuggets of wisdom. Remember, you could be better if you’d just try a little, kids.

1. Gwyneth on Being Yourself:

Gwyneth Paltrow on Being Rich - Superficial Gallery

2. Gwyneth on Ride Sharing:

Gwyneth Paltrow on Jets - Superficial Gallery

3. Gwyneth on Travel:

Gwyneth Paltrow on Paris - Superficial Gallery

4. Gwyneth on Gardening:

Gwyneth Paltrow on Zucchini Flowers - Superficial Gallery

5. Gwyneth on Social Decorum:

Gwyneth Paltrow on Drunks - Superficial Gallery

6. Gwyneth on Nutrition:

Gwyneth Paltrow on Cheese - Superficial Gallery

7. Gwyneth on Self-Sacrifice:

Gwyneth Paltrow on Other People - Superficial Gallery

8. Gwyneth on Child Rearing:

Gwyneth Paltrow on Cup-A-Soup - Superficial Gallery

9. Gwyneth on Being Fat:

Gwyneth Paltrow on Being Fat - Superficial Gallery

10. Gwyneth on Misconceptions:

Gwyneth Paltrow on Aloofness - Superficial Gallery

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18 Comments

  1. √2

    I’d suck her toes dry.

    Reply
  2. Rog

    Dear god. That’s gold.

    Reply
  3. hoodchick

    I finally understand why this is called Superficial Gallery.

    Reply
  4. Dan Brill

    How can she possibly pretend to be someone who makes $25,000 a year? It’s not like she’s a trained actress. Jeeze.

    Reply
  5. DasBub

    I remember when “Most Beautiful Woman” was run by the government. But in 1978, President Obama decided to privatize the celebrity rating functions and sold all the equipment to People Magazine (or Volks Frei Magaziner as it was then known). This is what you’ve done to us, America.

    Reply
  6. Angela Mia

    New party game: Cup-A-Soup or Death

    Reply
    • DasBub

      “Alright, Moses Bruce Anthony. Chicken Noodle or Glioblastoma multiforme?”

      Reply
  7. Nico Toscani

    She’s married to the douche from Coldplay. Is it surprising she’s a moron?

    Reply
  8. Cornmeal

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    Reply
  9. N Jill

    Huh, she really did turn into Emma Woodhhouse, and here I thought she was terribly cast in that role. My mistake.

    Reply
  10. Jenn Martinelli

    SHE IS SO TERRIBLE. The end.

    Reply
  11. Princess Peach

    I’m so confused as to what her and Brad Pitt used to talk about. And he was in his pot smoking hippie grungy phase when they dated.

    Reply
    • Dydan

      I agree wholeheartedly on that one. WTF did he see in her back then?

      Reply
  12. Dydan

    She really does nothing for me. She’s about as titillating as watching paint dry.

    Reply

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