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AHS: Apocalypse Ep 9: Flannel and Patagonia

AHS: Apocalypse Ep 9: Flannel and Patagonia

Well, folks, looks like we got the fire we were looking for from the slow burn of the season. This week’s episode of AHS: Apocalypse didn’t fail to deliver – and for that we must all “hail Satan”. But first, a moment of silence for the witches and warlocks fallen during this episode …… okay continuing on. Mead lit the metaphorical light under Michael’s ass with the help of Mutt and Jeff and finally propelled the plot forward towards annihilation. Everyone grab your favorite purple item and let’s dive into this week’s episode, “Fire and Reign.” 

What do you do for money, honey?

All this for a talk show?

Mallory is losing steam as she begins doubting her abilities. Cordelia and Myrtle comfort her and assure her that her powers are still growing. We find out who our mysterious traitor is – and it’s Dinah, of course. She manages to use her voodoo magic to break Cordelia’s protection spell on Robichaux Academy, allowing Michael and killer Mead to run a muck among the witches. With the toss of a hand, all of the witches are mowed down, except for Mallory, Cordelia, and Myrtle, who have managed to escape. There’s also Coco and Madison – where were they? In return for her “work”, Faux-prah is born when Satan green-lights a 13 episode talk show for Dinah. Although, it is worth pointing out that Dinah seems disturbed as she looks upon the carnage M&M have left behind. Maybe she will redeem herself in the finale?

This is how we do it in the Apocalypse.

But .. the witches ..

Time for some comic relief when Michael throws the mother of all tantrums about failing at his prophecy. Mead, powered by Mutt and Jeff, encourages Michael to think bigger to which he states he’s running for president. Laughter ensues as we realize he’s gotten his source material from “The Omen III”. The smart and good looking duo introduce Michael to the “Cooperative”. They explain that the Cooperative is in fact made up of the world’s most powerful people who have sold their soul to the devil. Bonus points for Michael as this is Daddy dearest. Dumb and dumber explain that Cooperative is code for Illuminati and that everyone involved can and will carry out his plan for an apocalypse. All he has to do is ask. Michael has one question – will this kill the witches? Uh, obsess much? 

Down on the Bayou.

My girls.

We finally realize that Misty is off gallivanting with Stevie – and who would blame her? Five years in Hell can be, well, hell, and we know the apocalypse is upon us. Cordelia uses Divination to assess the damage back at Robichaux Academy and awakes disturbed at the deaths of the students. While at the academy, Cordelia attempted to save Zoe and Queenie but fails as they disappear before she can perform Vitalim Vitalis. Ooops, Madison – magically back in the group with Coco – remembers that Michael can actually destroy a person’s soul as part of his magic, something she totally forgot to mention before. Cordelia lashes out and slaps her claiming she is the one that put their lives in danger. Deflect much there, Delia? Myrtle breaks up the fight and brings everyone back to their senses. Maybe there is a way to change the past. 

Tempus Infinituum

I am here to help.

We learn of a spell, Tempus Infinituum, that has been regarded as myth since there have been no documented successful cases of the spell in history. Myrtle adds that any case where the spell has been attempted has resulted in death. All eyes on Mallory. She’s sent back in time using this spell to try and stop the assassination of Nikolai Alexandrovich and family, including his daughter Anastasia, a secret sister. Anastasia attempts to use the spell to protect her family but fails, thus jump starting the Bolshevik Revolution. Mallory goes into the tub of water and comes out in the cellar with the Alexandrovich family. She attempts to help Anastasia with the protection spell, but fails when the spell fades. Mallory, visibly upset and bleeding from the eyes, returns. While she didn’t exactly stop the Bolshevik Revolution, she did prove that she could go back in time and help. This could come in handy to prevent Michael’s apocalypse.

Guess who’s NOT coming to Dinner?

Say what now?

Upon arriving at Hawthorne’s, Cordelia and Myrtle find themselves in a rather difficult position. They’ve come to seek assistance from allies John Henry and Behold, but find a gruesome scene instead. Michael has already gone back home and this time it wasn’t on friendly terms. All of the warlocks have been killed and placed in the shape of a pentagram. Well, I guess everyone’s leaving hungry.  Back at Mutt and Jeff’s place, Ms. Venable is packing her box and hitting the road. Until our nerdy duo let her in on a devious little secret. The world is ending and no one could ever run a safe place, a sanctuary, an outpost if you will, like Ms. Venable. So they invite her to join them in the Cooperation as a vital player in the aftermath of an apocalypse. She is thrilled. Hope the pay is better? Or at the least, she an stop pretending to be Daphne from Scooby-Doo. AHS we can do better!

The Man who Sold the World.

You are the key.

Michael poses a great question at the Cooperative headquarters: Why would so many choose to wear flannel and Patagonia? It’s a question that’s been on my mind for years. Black is just so much more flattering. Moving on, Mead is one hell of a motivational speaker. I need her in my life like yesterday. The members of the Cooperative meet Michael and they are instantly pleased. He provides them with packets and then begins to indulge his ultimate plan for destruction with the crew that’s gonna get it done. 

What did you think of this week’s episode? Did it give you the satisfaction you felt you needed? Or was it another disappointment in a series of episodes that haven’t lived up to the hype? Comment below and tell us your thoughts! Also, head over to our Top AHS Moments post and leave us your greatest AHS moments. Don’t forget to subscribe to Superficial Gallery for all the latest horror tea to quench your thirst. Join Acadia and Mells live Friday at 10:30pm ET on American Horror Stream, as we host our very first guest, Max from Relic podcast! Let’s make sure we give him the proper AHS welcome by trapping his spirit in in true AHS fashion. See you all there! 

About The Author

Mells Bells

Once upon a time there was a girl born on a dark and dreary winter day. She grew up knowing she was different from the others, but never being able to put her bony finger on what it was. Until one day she read a Stephen King novel, which unlocked the madness that would become her life. She quickly devoured book after book, moving on to classic horror films and deciding that she would live her life different from the others. She researched serial killers and tried to figure out the psyche behind what drove humans mad. She rapidly absorbed cold cases of missing people and became, if only in her mind, a savant of the true crime world. Now she lives her life converting unsuspecting humans to the dark side. The dark side of Mells. She now lives amongst the others as one of them. Waiting for her next conquest. She sounds crazy ... but make no mistake. Her Southern accent will put you in a trance and soon you too will become a true Mells Bells. Seriously, I have two dogs, a kid, and an old man. A devout horror fanatic and obsessed with true crime, I read a lot. A lot.

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