banner

Business Insider made some rules for being a man.  I am genuinely interested in your thoughts on these.  And on the simpler list from Playboy that follows it.  And on how I can get some fancy club in Las Vegas so I can have Charlotte McKinney be at the grand opening like Steve Wynn did at the Encore Players Club this week.  Gosh she’s pretty.  Oh, and I tried to think if I have any rules I live by and it turned out I did.  There aren’t many.

Acadia Rules

  • Work to eliminate your job.  It is the only way to advance.
  • Money going into someone else’s pocket is not coming out of yours.
  • If your boss tells you that she cannot afford to give you a raise, ask if the company is doing ok or if you should be worried.
  • Your socks match your pants and your belt matches your shoes.
  • (From Larry Miller) If you ask someone a question and they pretend they didn’t hear you, they’re thinking of a lie.
  • Happy couples have an acceptable balance of love and the practical things.
  • Don’t show your toes in public unless you are swimming.
  • Power is never given.  It is only taken.
  • (From my old co-manager, Laura) Blood makes people believe you.

Business Insider Man Rules:

  • Stop talking about where you went to college.
  • Always carry cash. Keep some in your front pocket.
  • Rebel from business casual. Burn your khakis and wear a suit or jeans.
  • It’s okay to trade the possibility of your 80s and 90s for more guaranteed fun in your 20s and 30s.
  • The best public restrooms are in hotels.
  • Never stay out after midnight three nights in a row… Unless something really good comes up on the third night.
  • Play competitive sports for as long as you can.
  • Never date an ex of your friend.
  • If riding the bus doesn’t incentivize you to improve your station in life, nothing will.
  • Time is too short to do your own laundry.
  • When the bartender asks, you should already know what you want to drink.
  • If you perspire, wear a damn undershirt.
  • You don’t have to like baseball, but you should understand the concept of what a pitcher’s ERA means. Approach life similarly.
  • When people don’t invite you to a party, you really shouldn’t go. And sometimes even when you are invited, you shouldn’t go.
  • People are tired of you being the funny, drunk guy.
  • When in doubt, always kiss the girl.
  • Tip more than you should.
  • You probably use your cell phone too often and at the wrong moments.
  • Buy expensive sunglasses.
  • Do 50 push-ups, sit-ups, and dips before you shower each morning.
  • Eat brunch with friends at least every other weekend. Leave Rusty and Junior at home.
  • Be a regular at more than one bar.
  • Act like you’ve been there before.
  • Laugh more.
  • A glass of wine or two with lunch will not ruin your day.
  • It’s better if old men cut your hair.
  • Learn how to fly-fish.
  • No selfies. Aspire to experience photo-worthy moments in the company of a beautifulwoman.
  • Own a handcrafted shotgun. It’s a beautiful thing.
  • There’s always another level. Just be content knowing that you are still better off than most who have ever lived.
  • You can get away with a lot more if you’re the one buying the drinks.
  • Ask for a salad instead of fries.
  • Don’t split a check.
  • Pretty women who are unaccompanied want you to talk to them.
  • Cobblers will save your shoes. So will shoe trees.
  • When a bartender buys you a round, tip double.
  • The cliche is that having money is about not wasting time. But in reality, money is about facilitating spontaneity.
  • Be spontaneous.
  • Find a Times New Roman in the streets and a Wingdings in the sheets. She exists.
  • Do not use an electric razor.
  • Desserts are for women. Order one and pretend you don’t mind that she’s eating yours.
  • Buy a tuxedo before you are thirty. Stay that size.
  • One girlfriend at a time is probably enough.
  • #StopItWithTheHashtags
  • Your ties should be rolled and placed in a sectioned tie drawer.
  • Throw parties. But have someone else clean up the next day.
  • You may only request one song from the DJ.
  • Measure yourself only against your previous self.
  • Take more pictures. With a camera.
  • Place-dropping is worse than-name dropping.
  • When you admire the work of artists or writers, tell them. And spend money to acquire their work.
  • Your clothes do not match. They go together.
  • Yes, of course you have to buy her dinner.
  • Staying angry is a waste of energy.
  • Revenge can be a good way of getting over anger.
  • If she expects the person you are 20% of the time, 100% of the time, then she doesn’t want you.
  • Always bring a bottle of something to the party.
  • Avoid that “last” whiskey. You’ve probably had enough.
  • Don’t use the word “closure” or ever expect it in real life.
  • If you are wittier than you are handsome, avoid loud clubs.
  • Drink outdoors. And during the day. And sometimes by yourself.
  • Date women outside your social set. You’ll be surprised.
  • If it’s got velvet ropes and lines, walk away unless you know someone.
  • You cannot have a love affair with whiskey because whiskey will never love you back.
  • Feigning unpretentiousness is worse than being pretentious.
  • The New Yorker is not high-brow. Neither is The Economist.
  • If you believe in evolution, you should know something about how it works.
  • No-one cares if you are offended, so stop it.
  • Never take an ex back. She tried to do better and is settling with you.
  • Eating out alone can be magnificent. Find a place where you can sit at the bar.
  • Read more. It allows you to borrow someone else’s brain.
  • Ignore the boos. They usually come from the cheap seats.
  • Hookers aren’t cool, but remember, the free ones are a lot more expensive.
  • Don’t ever say, “it is what it is.”
  • Give thoughtful gifts.
  • Don’t gamble if losing is going to piss you off.
  • Life is short. Wait for a good pitch to hit
  • Remember: “Rules are for the obedience of fools and the guidance of wise men”

Here are the Playboy ones.

guy code

 

Charlotte McKinney Pics

Invalid Displayed Gallery