According to Page Six, future Oscar AND Nobel prize winner Charlotte McKinney finally dumped Hollywood doofus Stephen Dorff. I didn’t finish reading the article because I had to get started right away packing the van I just stole with Funyuns so I can drive to Canada just in case Charlotte needs me in this tender time.
I know she is in Canada because we are friends on Snapchat. Or I follow her on Snapchat. We both have Snapchat. And she is there, working on something, or maybe fishing, and I bet she is realizing that having Stephen Dorff as her boyfriend was not helping her in any way. All it did was make it seem like she was C team after killing herself for a year to get to the B team. So now she has the Baywatch movie coming up and if she plays her cards right she can do some work for the site and I will give her a ride back from Canada in the van.
And I would share my Funyuns. That’s how much I care about her. Funyun level.
There are very few beaches in Canada that are that sandy and warm looking. Charlotte McKinney in the itty bitty black bikini with the red star trek stripe ranked #7 in the all Charlotte McKinney bikini bodies list.