A couple things.  1: I love Coolio.  I wish he lived next door to me.  2:  I have listened to Amish Paradise about 300 times today.  Sh*t is funny.  So I thought that Gangstas Paradise would be a nice slice of “keeping it real” here on Friday 90’s.  The song came from the gritty urban drama Dangerous Minds. I don’t remember much about the movie but I think it was about a hot white lady who teaches in a tough urban school and really wants to try to reach the poor not-white kids so they can grow up and go to college and become, I dunno, a general?  Maybe a Formula One driver?  How the hell do I know?

Anyway the important thing out of all this is what the hell happened to Michelle Pfeiffer?  Did she die?  Wasn’t she Catwoman?  Was Anne Hathaway born when Michelle was Catwoman?  How come Meryl Streep keeps getting roles when she has always looked like someone smashed a bird and an old man together at high speed?  And now she’s old and still keeps getting “middle aged lady” roles while poor Michelle Pfeiffer sits at home and doesn’t get to do anything.  Not fair.  Stupid Meryl Streep.  Oh, and why is L.V. who is singing the chorus in the video all sweaty?  He sort of looks like he’s taking a dump in the middle of a poker game.  Go look.  Pics and video are after the jump.  Also, Coolio says “fool” better than most people.  If he lived next door, I would mow his lawn for a whole summer if he would do my voice mail message (to the tune of Gangsta’s paradise).

Acadia’s not here, there aint nobody at his home.
If you don’t have the number, how can you call his cell phone?
I guess you can’t; I guess you won’t
I guess you front; that’s why I know your call is outta luck, fool!

Or something to that effect.

Coolio feat. L.V. – Gangstas Paradise

You want to tell me what this is all about?

As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
I take a look at my life and realize there’s not much left
Cause I’ve been blastin’ and laughin so long that
Even my ma’ma thinks that my mind is gone
But I ain’t never crossed a man that didn’t deserve it
Me, be treated like a punk, you know that’s unheard of
You better watch how you talkin, and where you walkin
Or you and your homies might be lined in chalk
I really hate to trip, but I gotta loc’-
As they grew I see myself in the pistol smoke, fool
I’m the kinda G the little homies wanna be like
On my knees in the night
Sayin prayers in the street light

Been spending most our lives living in the Gangsta’s Paradise
Been spending most our lives living in the Gangsta’s Paradise
Keep spending most our lives living in the Gangsta’s Paradise
Keep spending most our lives living in the Gangsta’s Paradise

They got the situation, they got me facin’
I can’t live a normal life, I was raised by the strip
So I gotta be down with the hood team
Too much television watchin’ got me chasin’ dreams
I’m an educated fool with money on my mind
Got my ten in my hand and a gleam in my eye
I’m a loc’ed out gangsta, set-trippin banger
And my homies is down, so don’t arouse my anger, fool
Death ain’t nuthin but a heart beat away
I’m livin life do-or-die-a, what can I say?
I’m twenty-three now, but will I live to see twenty-fow’?
The way things are goin’ I don’t know

Tell me why are we, so blind to see
That the ones we hurt, are you and me

Been spending most our lives living in the Gangsta’s Paradise
Been spending most our lives living in the Gangsta’s Paradise
Keep spending most our lives living in the Gangsta’s Paradise
Keep spending most our lives living in the Gangsta’s Paradise

Power and the money, money and the power
Minute after minute, hour after hour
Everybody’s runnin, but half of them ain’t lookin
What’s goin on in the kitchen, but I dont know what’s cookin
They say I got ta learn, but nobody’s here to teach me,
If they cant understand it, how can they reach me?
I guess they can’t; I guess they won’t
I guess they front; that’s why I know my life is outta luck, fool!

Been spending most our lives living in the Gangsta’s Paradise
Been spending most our lives living in the Gangsta’s Paradise
Keep spending most our lives living in the Gangsta’s Paradise
Keep spending most our lives living in the Gangsta’s Paradise

Tell me why are we, so blind to see
That the ones we hurt, are you and me
Tell me why are we, so blind to see
That the ones we hurt, are you and me