Did anyone ever whack off to this video?  I mean, I suppose someone must have, but many people?  I doubt it.  Even though this whole song is about whacking it (what’s the female equivalent of the term: “whacking it”?) I don’t think it is very good whacking material.  For that, you need some ZZ Top or Robert Palmer.  Maybe some old David Lee Roth.  But out of all of those I would think Robert Palmer’s “Simply Irresistible” is non stop whack city.  In fact….

OK, I’m back.  How ’bout that Divinyls song?  The pic I put in the banner is the hottest part of the whole video.  Look how bent over that chick is.  Can you imagine if you were there and that stupid cock-blocking guitar jerk was gone?  You could totally…be right back.

OK, I need to take a break.  Not since “She-Bop” from Cyndi Lauper had a woman sung so much about diddling herself.  Well, if you count unreleased gems like “I diddle myself a lot” by this girl from Portland who later that night peed in my living room.  Wow, that’s the first thing I have talked about in this whole post that hasn’t made me want to whack it.  Wait.  Maybe I’m just not trying hard enough.

Nope.  Nothing.  Lyrics and Video after the jump.

The Divinyls – I Touch Myself

I love myself I want you to love me
When I feel down I want you above me
I search myself I want you to find me
I forget myself I want you to remind me

I don’t want anybody else
When I think about you I touch myself
Ooh I don’t want anybody else Oh no, oh no, oh no

You’re the one who makes me come running
You’re the sun who makes me shine
When you’re around I’m always laughing
I want to make you mine

I close my eyes And see you before me
Think I would die If you were to ignore me
A fool could see Just how much I adore you
I get down on my knees I do anything for you

I don’t want anybody else
When I think about you I touch myself
Ooh I don’t want anybody else
Oh no, oh no, oh no

I want you I don’t want anybody else
And when I think about you I touch myself
Ooh, ooh, oo, oo ahh

I don’t want anybody else When I think about you
I touch myself Ooh I don’t want anybody else
Oh no, oh no, oh no