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Friday Nineties – Merril Bainbridge: Mouth

I decided to sissify Friday 90’s this week with a nice little dose of ‘never heard of her’ goodness.  Poor Merril Bainbridge.  She was just not something enough.  She could carry a tune, but not well enough.  Her song was not popular enough.  She wasn’t cute enough.  Didn’t die of a heroin overdose enough like the dude from Blind Melon.  She just…had a record.  And it had a pretty good song on it.  And I have good memories attached to this song.  Well, at least unbad ones (if that’s a word).  And that’s a real plus for me considering how my 90’s went.

As for the video, I guess it’s an example of the one thing she did enough.  She got macked on by that long haired dude from Nelson enough.  Too much.  Way too much.  The poor human beat box guy never even gets to prove he has a torso but Nelson gets to taste Merril’s salty lips the whole video?  BAD DECISION.  I suppose that’s how come she didn’t get more famous.  Or maybe it was because the song makes no sense.  At all.  Why are they gonna be on TV?  What?

Watch the video and read the lyrics after the jump.  If you can explain to me what the hell it’s about – you will win a free punch.  Not that you can punch someone.  I mean that someone from the gallery staff will punch someone on your behalf.  Who does the punching depends on the target.  so here we go!

I feel like Ive been blown apart..
There are pieces here I dont know where they go
(I dont know where they go)
Kiss me on my salty lips
bet you feel a little crazy but for me we’ll be famous on TV

Would it be my fault if I could turn you on
Would I be so bad if I could turn you on
When I kiss your mouth I want to taste it
Turn you upside down don’t wanna waste it

I jump on you, you jump on me
You pushed me out and even though you know I love you
I feel inclined to slap you in the mouth
When I kiss your salty lips you will feel a little crazy
but for me Ill be famous on TV

Would it be my fault if I could turn you on
Would I be so bad if I could turn you on
When I kiss your mouth I want to taste it
Turn you upside down don’t wanna waste it

Would it be my fault if I could turn you on
Would I be so bad if I could turn you on
When I kiss your mouth I want to taste it
Turn you upside down don’t wanna waste it

Now will it be my fault if I take your love and throw it
whyd you might restrain me
could you really blame me
And you will feel you blown apart
all the pieces there will fit to make you whole
And I know where they go

Would it be my fault if I could turn you on
Would I be so bad if I could turn you on
When I kiss your mouth I want to taste it
Turn you upside down don’t wanna waste it

When I kiss your mouth I want to taste it
Turn you upside down don’t wanna waste it

When I kiss your mouth I want to taste it
Turn you upside down don’t wanna waste it

About The Author

Acadia Einstein

I'm the funny one. And the handsome one. And I pay for everything.

9 Comments

  1. loolpooq

    he doesn’t want to let her ‘in’

    Reply
  2. Acadia

    what? also – get a goddamned gravatar!

    Reply
  3. Kim Hatheway

    I actually loved the post, quite interesting!

    Reply
  4. VetTech

    I wore this cassette out, and then got it on CD and now it’s in my ipod. Merril Bainbridge is awesome, I always wished she had done more.

    Reply
  5. Talen

    OMGWTF!!!…BAD BAD BAD…that was fooking awful. She couldn’t carry a tune if it had handles and an assistant to help.

    Acadia you never cease to amaze me with your tone deaf choices in music..You sir are the king of awful music.

    Reply
  6. Evangeline

    It must be sad to be a bodiless head.

    Reply
  7. Acadia

    Talen – you really have your rap down. I bet it gets you all the Freshman chicks.

    Reply
  8. Mee2

    I LOVE Merril Bainbridge. I have her CD. I’ve had it for like a decade? I also absolutely lover her Under the Water song. Actually I had that one on my Music Monday just recently.

    Reply
  9. Bobbi Jo Woods

    I always got these whiny ’90s music bitches mixed up…Lisa Loeb, Sixpence None The Richer, Paula Cole, Natalie Imbruglia, I could go on. ’80s whiny bitches was where it was at, man. Seriously. How could anyone EVER mix up Tracy Chapman with Annie Lennox? Or Cyndi Lauper with Nancy Wilson? Whitney Houston with Sinead O’Connor? Laura Branagan and Debbie Gibson? See what I’m doing, here? Screw those ’90s chicks.

    Reply

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