Our oil was safe. Safe and cheap. Yep!
So everyone is still talking about the potential damage the big oil spill can cause. And the current damage it has caused. And how we need to give the fishermen of Louisiana money. And now Florida is getting in on the act and I’m sick of it. According to some website I found:
The oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico 2010 is drawing closer to the Loop Current. Reuters reports that scientists say once the BP oil leak is in the loop, it could reach the Florida Keys in 10 days.
10 days. Ten. X days.
If you gave me 10 days notice, I could probably learn enough Russian to trick a customs official or figure out how to pan for gold. Or I could get the Army and Navy together to figure out how to keep a giant oil slick that everyone has known about for a fucking month away from your important coastline. I mean, it isn’t like we have an entire branch of the military designed to do nothing but guard the coast?
What’s that?
Ladies and gentlemen, I’ve just been handed a note that tells me that in fact there IS a “Coast Guard”. Apparently the ideas of setting up giant fans to blow the oil to Mexico or hire manatees with brooms (which I said like, three weeks ago) are not being considered. And the alternative ideas are apparently: nothing followed closely by complaining. Seems like if people are so worried about their precious reef, they ought to be building a fence around it. What’s that you say? There’s no time?
There’s 10 days. Assholes. Build some kind of fence.
What? We have a Coast Guard? Guess they are on siesta.
It’s highly irresponsible for them to ignore your Manatees with Brooms suggestion. It makes you wonder if they even want to stop it.
.-= Shawn´s last blog ..The Perfect Post =-.
And what? We have a military that’s supposed to protect our country? What? I had no idea. I thought when I served in the Army I was merely there to protect our oil in the Middle East. What’s this protecting America you speak of?
Coast Guard. Bogus.
.-= Cassie´s last blog ..the world is going to end like terminator 3 =-.
ONLY NINE DAYS NOW
Shut up. Turn off your water heater, park your car, quit using Saharan Wrap, and check in to a “I am a plastic addict” 12 step program.
No? Then suck it up and get used to greasy fish.
.-= catswiththumbs´s last blog ..U.S. Navy Donates F-14 Fighters to Greenpeace =-.
Is Saharan Wrap some kind of sandy wrap?
Man, the more I read about this, the more I wonder if those in charge are taking this seriously.
.-= Drew Beatty´s last blog ..So confused right now =-.
Acadia cleverly wrote:
Har. You don’t want oil issues? Stop using oil products – wrap your leftovers in newspaper (treehuggerites will get you), ride your bike to work (I’ll pay for pics), hate your carpet (see treehuggerites against wood flooring), demand organic computer chips (good luck), and only wear cotton clothing processed with a hand-driven loom.
We can relegate the downtrodden to replace those needless scientific advances.
Martini?
.-= catswiththumbs´s last blog ..U.S. Navy Donates F-14 Fighters to Greenpeace =-.
I don’t care about oil. Unless aliens give us fusion every fucking drop of the stuff is going to get used up before we move on to something else. This is America, we do things when we ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO and not a minute before.
If dolphins are so smart, why don’t they find a way to fix it. Also, do dolphins have a lame superhero names terradolphin who can go on land and not help anything…
Not sure how the brooms would help? Perhaps they’d take you more seriously if you were suggesting manatees with Wet/Dry Shopvacs.
aliens already gave us fusion – haven’t you heard of Roswell? It’s all a big cover-up by the major oil interests. In fact, Elvis was gonna expose it all before they killed him.
8 days and counting. The shame about it is that all that oil is going to cause some serious changes to a lot of environments. As for the Keys, hell, build a damn with the conch shells left over from dinner and the umbrellas from the drinks and maybe we can get a couple more days for everyone to sit on their hands. Where’s that FEMA guy that got beat down after N.O. Maybe we can toss him in to the slick to suck it all up.
.-= David Sobkowiak´s last blog ..So much time, so little to do… =-.