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Law and Order SVU – Sex Slaves Ahoy!

Stabler:  Yep.  I farted.  Benson:  Yep.  You did.

Stabler: Yep. I farted. Benson: Yep. You did.

Tonight is the season finale of Law and Order SVU.  And I know you bastards watch it at some point.  Even if you don’t watch the first runs, you start watching it when you see it on USA.  I spent a whole weekend watching the damn show on Netflix because apparently I am addicted to the concept of sex slaves.  As you know, one out of every four episodes of the show involve some type of sex slavin’.  I don’t see how people dare to go to the store in NYC.  From the way this show tells it, you head out for some Snapple and BAM!  Sex Slave.

But, I did want to point out some things that make the show cool.  And if you don’t watch it now (both of you) you can just leave your TV on for a couple hours and it will show up.  Even if you are watching a channel that doesn’t exist, like J or Apple Pie.

  • Mariska Hargitay and Chris Meloni (or something) were bitching about making more money.  I don’t know anything more that that.  My research assistant is a little matchbox car and it sucks at it’s job.
  • Mariska Hargitay had a collapsed lung a couple times.  I don’t think the size of her boobs was affected.
  • The character Munch, played by The Belz, was originally a character on Homicide, another NBC show.  The only other time they ever did that was when Coolidge from The White Shadow was on St. Elsewhere.  The scene with him and the Van Patten kid who played Salami was gold!
  • Sex Slaves usually dislike their jobs. On the other hand, pimps seem to have a high level of job satisfaction.  I have never EVER seen a ‘reformed’ pimp.
  • I liked the ADA with the red hair who looked like a bird the most.
  • Chris Meloni was on Oz.  He Was Keller.  Keller is the single best character ever written in any show ever.  Keller would have killed everyone in Archie Bunker’s house, then taken a bus to Milwaukee and ass raped The Fonz.  And yeah, I know he would have had to travel through time to do that.  He could have.
  • Ice-T.  Sometimes I am watching the show and they will be like, Hey Finn!  But I say: That’s Ice-T!
  • In an unrelated note, I just finished watching I’m a Celebrity, get me out of here.  Janice Dickinson looks like the Sphinx.
  • In a related note, Janice Dickinson once played a sex slave on SVU.  As did John Salley and Lou Diamond Phillips.
  • I wonder if this post is gonna get picked up in the search engines for people looking for sex slaves.  If so – I will be here waiting to catch them, just like Munch!

About The Author

Acadia Einstein

I'm the funny one. And the handsome one. And I pay for everything.

5 Comments

  1. Sheila Sultani

    You forgot one interesting thing. Mariska Hargitays mom was the gorgeous Jayne Mansfied who was killed in a car accident while Mariska was sitting in the back seat.

    Reply
  2. adonistic

    Acadia! How did you get out of your leather harness again? Bad Slave! Kneel and lick my boots!

    Reply
  3. Film-Book dot Com

    This is one of my favorite shows on television.

    Reply
  4. Maitland

    I think you are correct on Keller.

    Reply
  5. midge

    womp womp

    Reply

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