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Monday Pun Day – Volume 1

Monday Pun Day – Volume 1
Pun Protractor

If you don’t get this, we can’t be friends.

A Pun – All The Time

Welcome to the first edition of Monday Pun Day’s at the Superficial Gallery.  I know you’re as excited about this as I am.  Puns are the highest form of humor and we should all work to cultivate our street pun creds.  To that end, I’m going to drop a few puns on your that will elevate you to demi-god status.    

  • She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
  • Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
  • The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large!
  • A man walks into a zoo.  The only animal in the entire zoo is a dog.  It’s a shitzu.
  • What do you call a snobbish criminal walking down the stairs?  A condescending con descending.
  • You’re living.  You occupy space.   You have mass.  You know what that means?  You matter.
  • What’s the tallest building in any city?  The library because it has the most stories.
Roman puns are the best.

Roman puns are the best.

Did You Know?

A pun is also called “paronomasia.”

A pun relies on conflating of homonyms and near-homonyms to make a hilarious joke. Subverting the language is what makes a pun so effective.  A good pun exploits the ambiguity between similar-sounding words for humorous or rhetorical effect.  

OK – this is done.  I do want to leave you with a warning though.  This is deadly serious and I urge you to heed my advice:

Never, ever, buy flowers from a monk.  Seriously.  Only YOU can prevent florist friars!

Puns make us head bang!

Puns make us head bang!

About The Author

Sparks

Sparks doesn’t know why he’s here. He just does techie things for the Gallery and, as a result, takes all the blame when sh!t’s broken. Because of this, Sparks has become best friends with fire water (aka whiskey) and antacids. When he’s not cursing Acadia for screwing up the site again, Sparks is a writer, poet, and published author. You can check out his stuff at http://www.ronsparks.com.

3 Comments

  1. Acadia Einstein

    The first picture made me AUDIBLY GROAN

    Reply
    • Cider

      Same

      Reply
  2. Sparks

    What? You’re not pro-tractor?

    Reply

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