Monday Pun Day – Volume 1

Pun Protractor

If you don’t get this, we can’t be friends.

A Pun – All The Time

Welcome to the first edition of Monday Pun Day’s at the Superficial Gallery.  I know you’re as excited about this as I am.  Puns are the highest form of humor and we should all work to cultivate our street pun creds.  To that end, I’m going to drop a few puns on your that will elevate you to demi-god status.    

  • She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
  • Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
  • The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large!
  • A man walks into a zoo.  The only animal in the entire zoo is a dog.  It’s a shitzu.
  • What do you call a snobbish criminal walking down the stairs?  A condescending con descending.
  • You’re living.  You occupy space.   You have mass.  You know what that means?  You matter.
  • What’s the tallest building in any city?  The library because it has the most stories.
Roman puns are the best.

Roman puns are the best.

Did You Know?

A pun is also called “paronomasia.”

A pun relies on conflating of homonyms and near-homonyms to make a hilarious joke. Subverting the language is what makes a pun so effective.  A good pun exploits the ambiguity between similar-sounding words for humorous or rhetorical effect.  

OK – this is done.  I do want to leave you with a warning though.  This is deadly serious and I urge you to heed my advice:

Never, ever, buy flowers from a monk.  Seriously.  Only YOU can prevent florist friars!

Puns make us head bang!

Puns make us head bang!

Ron Sparks is a science fiction and fantasy author and poet. His book "ONI: Satellite Earth Series Book 1" was recently published and is available on For more info on Ron, see:


  1. Acadia Einstein
    March 21, 2017 at 1:56 pm

    The first picture made me AUDIBLY GROAN

    • Cider
      March 21, 2017 at 4:19 pm


  2. Sparks
    March 21, 2017 at 3:24 pm

    What? You’re not pro-tractor?

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