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Screw you, Darwin.

Sheesh Darwin, cheer up.  You look like Jack the Ripper.

Sheesh Darwin, cheer up. You look like Jack the Ripper.

You know how sometimes you are watching Discovery Channel or History Channel or SyFy and they have a show about looking for mythical creatures?  Bigfoot, the chupacabra, the Loch Ness monster and all other shit consumes the imagination of some people.  I mean, who wouldn’t want to sit around in the woods for a few weeks waiting for Bigfoot? Or the Jersey Devil?  Or some other thing.

Would you be scared? I wouldn’t.  Seriously.  Bigfoot is like Chewbacca and everyone knows Chewbacca is all kindly and whatnot unless you beat him and space chess.  And anyway, if you check with Darwin (remember, this post is about Darwin) it seems like natural selection has left us with just mundane unscary animals.  We just have whales and pumas and donkeys and kangaroos.  Nothing creepy or scary looking at all.  Look through those cute little animals below.  How could a world that produces such adorable creatures also produce a chupacabra?  It couldn’t.  So take a look at the little cuties below.  My favorite is the blobfish.  I call him Blobby Brady.  Thanks for keeping things nice and simple and not scary Mister Darwin!

About The Author

Acadia Einstein

I'm the funny one. And the handsome one. And I pay for everything.

1 Comment

  1. Doctor Faustroll

    An abominable snow crab?

    Reply

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