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South Carolina – Thy Name is Fat

They will fry anything! But at the end of this set of pics is something fried that defies physics!

I have never had a post where there were so many contenders for the banner pic.  After the jump you will see some horrible things the South Carolina State Fair tried to get me to eat.  But before I got to that, I thought you should see the kind of things they were pushing that you couldn’t eat.  Shaney Spires down there won an unfortunately titled scholarship.  There were plenty of people there who were apparently worried that I was going to seek out a pregnant woman and whale her in the gut with a bat and that Jesus would rather I didn’t.

But I think the best part was the food.  You know how some states are known for a kind of food?  Like, Maine has lobsters.  New Mexico has green chiles.  Chicago has deep dish pizza.  Texas has, I don’t know, shakes served by pompous jerks.  Anyway.  I was all excited to find out what South Carolina was famous for.  As I sat at the end of the ski lift style gondola thing I realized that the food stands I saw had an effect.  See the people were supposed to hop off the ski lift chair and jog over to the left.  But most of the people couldn’t jog.  They just got bumped to the side or knocked over or the dude had to stop the whole thing.  There was not a lot of athleticism on display.  After the jump you will see why.  Oh, but the pics in the pig races were fast as hell!

The South Carolina State Fair (made of fat)

Might as well get this out of the way first. I didn't look at it. I didn't want to get too near at. And I didn't see anyone eat it. But I did see a dead guy behind the stand.

I want a pork chop. But I don't want to sit down. What do I do? A stick you say? Why thank you!

These look good, but there should be something that is worse for me. A little bit of blood is still getting through one of my arteries.

There we go. Doughnut Burger. I'll have two, please.

And now – the thing the “experts” said couldn’t be fried.  But somehow, using good old American ingenuity, South Carolina figured it out.  Science lives!

I almost got it. I still sort of want to go back and get it. I need to know how it works. It sounds like it was invented by Lex Luthor.

Tied for best non-edible thing: Horrifying Michael Jackson Prize

And the other top entry in the non-edible class: Miss Jr. Beef 2010!

About The Author

Acadia Einstein

I'm the funny one. And the handsome one. And I pay for everything.


  1. sangfroid

    seriously? Deep fried butter? I mean everyone eats donut burgers with their fried kool aid but Deep Fried Butter is over the line.

  2. Beans

    I’m getting a doughnut burger RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!

  3. VetTech

    I once saw Paula Dean make deep fried mayo

  4. Malissa

    Yuck! That “kool aid” thing is like cherry fried cake batter btw. I asked someone that went to a fair.

  5. TB

    How in the hell do they deep fry butter??? Is it just a pocket of breading with liquid butter in the middle? You should have asked the dead guy. I must google this now.

  6. Kristin

    I’m still trying to wrap my head around deep fried butter and deep fried cookie dough. I mean, if you apply heat to those things…they melt. Maybe I’m thinking too rationally about this. Btw, I would really like a description of the “garbage burger,” if you don’t mind. It sounds right up my alley.

    And, doughnuts with a burger? Um, please. Doughnuts then burgers, maybe followed by more doughnuts, but to eat them together is silly.

    • Katherine

      Yeah I got the fried cookie dough and some fried candy. They are melted when u bite into them, but the fried outside keeps it from going everywhere. Idk about the fried butter, I bet it would be messy. :/

  7. Shawna Elkins

    OMG!! I thought Fried Butter was bad! You should definitely go back and get the Fried Kool-Aid!! I’ll pitch in, I really want to see pictures of it!!!

  8. Katherine

    Omg that first picture caught my eye because I bought fried goodies from that exact stand last weekend! I was at the sc fair last weekend, what a coincidence to stumble upon this article 🙂 anyways, I thought deep fried butter sounded good :/ maybe it’s a southern thing? But yeah I saw the kool aid thing that’s just ridiculous! When me and my friend saw it we both were like “what….?” At the fried stand, I got the candy combo which was a fried twix, reeses cup, Oreo, and cookie dough. They were all delicious!!!! I love me some fried fair food 🙂

  9. Sarah BB @ East9thStreet

    Um, was this held in York County? I think I worked with some of the people selling that stuff!


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