The Gallery has been following Survivor all season so we would be able to throw up a half-assed post 5 minutes after the finale starts.  Here are my picks in order for who will win.  Vange can put hers after mine if she wants.  It doesn’t start for her for another hour.  Or maybe I will spoil it on IM.  Or Twitter.  Hey California!  SUCK IT!

  1. Jerri – the 40 years since season 2 have mellowed her.  And her hair can still blind other players.
  2. Parvati – people will vote for her over Russell cause they will wonder why the fuck a former winner was allowed to last this long.
  3. Russell – if he doesn’t win he will attack people physically.  A maniacal gnome stabbing fools.  Good TV.  I hope he doesn’t win.
  4. Sandra – she’s gross.  She looks like someone flattened her head out with a head flattening device.  I don’t have very good criteria…
  5. Colby – he quit the second day and people keep forgetting he’s there.  He can win if the final two immunities are sleeping and bitching at your brother.
  6. Jeff Probst –  he’s always so clean.  I know he can’t win but boy howdy he’s a good host.  He’s like Phil Keoghan from Amazing Race except he walks around sometimes.

I have to say this Survivor is better than the one with marbles and the board with the holes and those slidey things.

That's much better!

Ahhh, innit that so much better?

Edited because Acadia selected an icky pic of DONALDSON for the collage up top.

UPDATE: That labyrinth challenge had the closest finish ever.  Holy crap.

UPDATE:  My reason for not wanting Pavarti to win is as dumb as Acadia’s for not liking Sandra’s smushed up head.  Anyway, Pavarti has more gums than teeth and that bugs me like crazy.

UPDATE: WTF was Russell thinking ditching Jerry instead of Pavarti?  He just gave the game away.  Sorry PST.

UPDATE: Pretty sure from the thousand yard stare Rupert is throwing at Russell he does not respect the bandy legged gnome’s game play.

UPDATE: Rupert’s was the most illuminating Q&A; he may have just won a millions smackers for Sandra.  Candice’s was the most intriguing to me as her criteria seems aligned with my “vote for integrity and character” naivete.

UPDATE: I wouldn’t recognize Pavarti in real life.  What is up with these chicks looking better in the wilderness?  It seems like shaving their armpits is the only improvement returning to civilization had for them.

Sandra just won and I think she should toss a big chunk of cash Rupert’s way.  And spend another chunk on a dress that doesn’t look like something her grandmother would wear to a wedding.  That dress concerns me.

UPDATE: I’m still LOLing that Russell didn’t get a single vote.