I was painting my bathroom and missed the first 15 minutes but tuned in just in time to see teams arrive in China to ride yaks across some bizarre dam or weir. Team Cowboy had no issue with this task, shockingly. Next, teams rode a gondola to some high altitude. As someone who lives over 5,000 feet above sea level, I’m waiting to see someone get super sick. Team Goth is way behind.

Teams then had to perform a pretty tough  Road Block wherein they needed to assemble a mobile or wind chime containing all the animals of the Chinese zodiac in the correct order. Team Asian Father/Daughter Team had a super advantage on this as the girl’s mom had made her memorize the animals in Chinese. Team Vanilla Father/Daughter got it right on the first try. Team Cowboys got it pretty quickly, too. Big Easy rocked it and did a big chest bump with Flight Time in celebration. Team Aspberger struggled with Aspbergy getting very frustrated.

Teams next took a bus to the next clue, with Team Asian Father/Daughter taking a golf cart or something, realizing their mistake when the bus with Team Globetrotters went by. Being the super awesome guys they are, they told the driver to stop and let Father/Daughter get on.

Before getting the clue for the Detour, teams had to write a wish and say their name of their zodiac animal as they submit it to the giant wish jar. Team Globetrotters had no clue what animal represents their year of birth. The Detour was Hammer (preparing candy in a traditional way) or Horn (carrying a long cumbersome horn leading a procession to some location).

The girl goth was having trouble concentrating, felt dizzy, and weird. YAY altitude sickness!

Team Bitchleader chose the Horn Detour and changed tasks when they saw how unwieldy the horn was, thus losing time.  This is pretty dang super. I’m also drinking heavily. Teams who chose the candy hammer detour seemed to complete it pretty easily. The dad in Team Asian loved eating the candy. Team Globetrooter did the Horn Detour and made me laugh a lot. The next clue directed teams to the Pit Stop.

I’m screaming “COWBOYS!” at the fucking TV as they start showing teams approach the Pit Stop and it was gawd damn Team Deaf. Phil informs them of a twist, making Luke howl like a wounded cow: “You are still racing.” Heyyyyyy, Team Goth left their super cool fanny pack on the tram. They are so super fucked now, it had their money and passports and everything in it.

The teaser for next week implied Team Deaf reached the U Turn first and used it.