I was gonna wait until I finished watching the movie to write the review, but then I realized that however the story comes out, my opinion is not going to change. And since I do my reviews in bullet list format, all I have to do is leave this open and keep making bullet points!
By the way – I rented this from the Big Red Box at *Harris Teeter. If you have one of those Big Red Boxes in your supermarket – get your DVD’s from there. It rules. Anyway – on to the show!
- It looks neat. Like how some of it is black and white and some of it is color. Like Sin City but not as much.
- They introduce all the main characters in like, the first 5 minutes, which I liked. I hate waiting for the villain to show up.
- The villain is Samuel L. Jackson who is filming movies more days a year than he isn’t.
- His name is the Octopus, which is stupid.
- I don’t know who plays The Spirit, but I doubt he will be very famous for very long.
- Eva Mendes is in it and I haven’t been paying attention so I don’t know if she is bad or good or in between but she does show her ass so bonus!
- Scarlett Johansson lets her tits do the talking for most of the movie. And that’s actually good, because the things they give her to say are pretty stupid.
- At least two main characters dress up like Nazi’s.
- The fat guys are funny.
- There is a cat in the movie.
- The Nazi’s sure were good at stagecraft. <–this is not out of context.
- Belly Dancers don’t make scary killers.
- The movie definitely does not take itself very seriously.
- HA! The Belly Dancer’s name is Plaster of Paris.
OK – now I am getting bored. I am not invested in anything except Scarjo’s villain boobs. They need to do something fast!
- The Spirit is a horndog?
- There is an annoying lady cop.
- It has an old timey plane in it. Like, not just a prop plane, but an old timey kind.
- I assume they are looking to have it open for a sequel, but I don’t see that happening. I heard it did shitty. Then again, they make sequels of shitty movies all the time. Like, the next DVD I have to watch is Underworld 3 and it doesn’t even have Kate Beckinsale in it. For fuck’s sake – why else would you watch an Underworld movie? Well, I guess technically I am going to find out.
*Harris Teeter is my local grocery store. You know how there are always a few in your town. The really good one, the ok one and the one that you would only go to if they had a wicked sale on something that came in a can? Well, Harris Teeter is my OK one, I think. The really good one is not near enough to me to have me drive there just to get a red frigging box. What am I, Mister Drive Around?
And that’s my review of The Spirit!