I got this in my email like, 4 seconds ago from my friend Leonidas (he’s a real guy, not an oiled up homo) who wanted me to tell him what Kirk was holding in this pic.  Not wanting to make him feel bad for not being able to identify your basic raggedy rock-wiener, I decided to post it and let you all make some guesses.

And you can’t pick raggedy rock-wiener.  But you can pick: “World’s grossest pillow” or write your own caption like: “Uhura!  Come Back!  I was just playin’!”.

And if none of those are doing it for you then give me your own.  It’s late and I took back pills.  Stop your judging.  You don’t know me.